Every sense is gone,
What's the time, what's the day,
Am I waking, am I asleep?
Has the time stopped, or is it me?
There was searing pain,
Like a dagger had pierced my heart.
Then there were tears,
Now the eyes are numb
Resting in the dark pits of agony...
All the pain in the world had to dawn
On simultaneously.
It was all bright outside,
Still my head went dark...
Every wound reopened...
I sit bleeding in suspended animation...
There are times when everything spirals...
We try to hold on desperately...
Even if we know the hopes may be too high...
When the world itself is in shambles,
This was expected, still...
Revisit the pains all over again,
Try not to think, but thoughts won't stop.
Head goes numb and words are chocked.
Sleep would never come before too, but now
Sleep will never come until you fall down.
You don't expect anyone to understand your pain,
Yes there is pain no matter how much you deny,
Suppress, repress, try to forget...
It will always be there and it is what it is.
May be this is the what you have been dreading,
Today or tomorrow it has to come...
What has to happen has to happen...
Everything spirals down,
Endlessly....
And you have to face it all alone...
I am angry and upset. My anger is bubbling like lava and it will flow incessantly if these continue. So should yours. If you deem yourself to be a human. X(
The reason for this is the news about the deaths of 3 under 25 women within a time span of 3 days. The ages of the women, 24, 23 and the latest one 19! Last year another woman of about 25 years was murdered by her husband and family. This is a resurgence of bride killings. Why are these happening? 25 and below is the age one gets an education, searches for a job and so on, not getting "imprisoned, extorted" and murdered. X( When such news come everybody makes a hullabaloo and then forgets. Nothing is done to eradicate this. Dowries still flow under and over the radar, women still get murdered.
If a woman is being "married off" at such a young age, then it is proof that there is something wrong with the parents of those women (and those of the men who teach young boys that they can kill a girl if they want to). Girls are like chicken grown to be butchered and eaten. We are not supposed to have a life of our own. Our lives don't matter. The (fake) "prestige" of our families depend on our marital status, within how many years of marriage we reproduce (have you ever thought that asking/commenting about whether someone has a child or not is equivalent to being nosy into someone's sex life and is a form of sexual harassment?) and how long our marriages last. Our achievements, our education, our financial independence do not matter. Oh well, how will any of these matter when our own lives don't matter?
What the parents whose fragile prestige/social ego depends on the preconceived notions of how a woman's life (of subservience) don't understand is that they are the ones contributing to such social evils in the first place. On what guarantee are you sending a single person not trained in combat to play "Mortal Combat" in real life in a house full of abusers? This is unacceptable. On what basis are you telling a woman that she has to tolerate harassment and violence to "protect" your fragile "social statuses" at the cost of her life? This is not acceptable. You cannot cut off your own daughter's education and then marry her off (to death) no matter whatever it is. Do you idiotic parents really think that a man who is the product of a patriarchal society (whose endorsers you too are) will "protect" your daughter? Your daughter is very well capable of "protecting" herself and thriving if you do not force her into alien households where she faces violence. If the parents of girls cannot let go off their own false prejudices about the abilities of their female offsprings, those girls will ultimately suffer violence and die.Especially if they are young and not financially independent.
You marry a girl off to "protect" her from random people who may attack her, into a household where she is sure to be attacked 24 X 7 X 365. Inside the 4 walls of the house is where she will never be able to cry for help or seek help. God knows how many more women have gone through these stuff during the pandemic. By being idiotic you are being part of a social evil. Why the hell did you not realise your duty as a parent to your own child? If you are living in the 21st century why don't you act responsible towards your child? (Or is it that your love and care are skewed only towards your male child and are you also ultimately hoping to get dowry from his bride?)
Just because a woman has grown up doesn't mean that you can push her into being murdered at the hands of random people. So these incidents are happening time and time again not just because of the entitlement of the man (husband) and his family, but also due to the impudence of the parents of a woman who refuse her the right to life. X( The truth is a woman is not safe in her own home because she is abused mentally and forced to get married and go and die in another house. She is not safe in the other household because they are violent and abusive. And she has no money of her own or means to survive, so she cannot leave but her only option is to die or get murdered and the hands of abusers. X( X( X(
I want to ask a major question. All these parents sit and cry after the girl is dead. It was your fault in the first place that you were foolish, selfish and irrational to
1) marry off a your daughter at a young age
2) break her education
3) and destroy her chances of getting a well paid employment which could have helped her take care of herself
It is your fault that you imprisoned her, traded her off and then she was butchered. You are failures as parents. You don't even have the right to call yourselves parents and siblings. You must be prudent enough to read the data and understand that many women are suffering from domestic violence. (That won't happen if you are imprisoned by your stupid beliefs and egos. X( X( X( )
a) To young women who may be forced into marriages you don't like - have the courage to fight. If your own family abuses you into abusive relations/marriage, file a case. No family is worth having if they do not respect your life in the first place.
b) To governments/authorities/policy makers establish help and support systems. If the parents of a student are forcing her to get married and break her education provide her support/safety and means to continue her education. Even if she is not a brilliant student who may not be good at studies, teach her a vocation so that she can find an employment and be financially independent.
c) Again to young women - always get an employment no matter even if it is low paid. It is very important to be financially independent and you must be able to walk/run away freely and go to a safe place even if your own parents ditch you for running away from a violent marriage/in law household. Your life is more important than anything else in this world. A man, marriage or maternity is not the most important thing in your life. YOUR LIFE IS.
This is a serious issue which needs immediate attention. Young (and old) women cannot thrown to murder like this. If a woman is getting killed in the name of dowry there is fault on the sides of both the parents of the bride and the husband and the family. Dowry is extortion. If parents of a woman are so much interested in getting extorted they should just give way their money to random strangers. Why bring their daughter into it and kill her? X( X( X(
PS: I have not written anything about how a man's entitlement due to his gender has a role to play in all these. Bride killing is murder. It is a crime. And anyone who contributes to the death of a human being is a criminal. How many more women's lives will it take to solve it? X( X( X(
This was motivated and inspired by a valentine's day card shared by ICECUBE and the song "Hum mile ya na mile". Here is my post valentine's day musing.
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A Neutrino Love Story
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I love a love with a mass squared difference
For though we start together we travel differently
Yet we will meet sometime, somewhere
In time, past the distances
Then reminisce, be us and move on...
To meet as someone else again...
Still moving on, hoping to meet yet again.
There is love in the anticipation,
The longing in the journey,
Through emptiness or matter
That may resonate us or not.
What is love without a mass squared difference?
Without ups and downs, sines and cosines,
The masses and the mixing,
How much of you in me and me in you;
The melody of patterns
Where we meet and retreat...
Until we meet someone
Who tells our story
In light and delight...
What is my love for you
Without the tiny difference?
For we may have no story
Without the mass square difference!
Yours truly,
m_i
