Thursday, March 14, 2019

The infinite loop

Every moment in life feels like a struggle
Every cell in the body seems to stuggle
Every inch of the mind is struggling
To not be bored with the monotony
Which makes it presence felt severly.
The same things being done,
The same things not done;
Life feels like a sum of would have beens, could have beens,
And never have beens.
Losing lustre,
Headed nowhere.
With the nagging feel of monotony,
Always playing at the back of the mind..

Life is stuck in an infinite loop,
Doing the same things over and over,
Again and again and again and again
And again and again and again and again
And again and again and again and again
And again and again and again and again...
Ah! The monotony of it.
The never ending, never breaking loop;
Making you forget the goals,
And the places to go;
Stretching the limits of patience
Ofcourse "patience is a virtue",
But even virtues have expiry dates.

The infinite loop - it has invaded,
The body and the mind.
I am stuck in a limbo,
With no way out.
It's not dark, but it's grey
It's not terrifying, but it is taxing,
Extremely taxing.
The feeling of being stuck,
With no way forward.

Even hope does not work here,
It has all been sucked out,
Pulling me to the depths of despair,
Will I ever climb back up?

"Slow and steady wins the race"
Says the old wisdom.
Then why is patience not winning this race
Patience streched to its farthest limits?
This race against monotony?
It is gradually eating me up.
Nothing to look forward to,
Nothing to hope for, the world is grey,
Has lost its colour, lustre, everything...

It is an infinite loop,
Slowly but steadily,
Consuming everything,
Every bit of mind,
Every bit of me.