Multiverse and desire

 Disclaimer: Those who have not watched "Multiverse of Madness" should read this only after watching it. 

     So I watched Multiverse of Madness after much anticipation. Marvel kept on reminding me when my collaboration meeting date was, since the movie was releasing on May 6th and I was traveling exactly on that day. Had I been in my city, I would have gone the next day to watch it. But because of the collaboration meeting and a plan that others would also come watch it, I waited impatiently for one more week. Then on the next Saturday I went to watch it. My company didn't seem to like or understand the context of the movie. Obviously one need to have watched Wanda Vision, What If , Loki and Spider-man No Way Home to understand a lot of things in this movie. ☺

 What this movie experience made me realise is that - never wait out of courtsey for someone who offers to come to a movie with you if you really want to watch a movie. The chances are that they might not like the movie and you may end up feeling unnecessarily guilty and also feel bad that you didn't watch it when you wanted to which is the next day of release! You should just go and watch a movie when you want to watch it. Most importantly I realised that there is a difference when I go to watch a movie alone vs with someone.

 When I go to movies alone, it is just out of love for cinema. There is nothing like going for a movie, buying caramel popcorn and sitting with a hall full (or half full in 2021) of strangers who also feel the same emotion as you. Though you are strangers there is an invisible thread of fandom or love of cinema connecting you and it feels good. 

Anyway this is not the main point of this post. Those who have watched the movie already know the story that Wanda is trying to bring "her" children from another universe and she needs powers to travel across universes. Dr.Strange is trying to protect America Chavez, whose powers Wanda wants to take for herself.  Dr. Strange and America Chavez travel through the  multiverse and reach Earth 838 where Dr. Strange meets another Christine. There are two tear jerking moments in this movie. One is when Dr.Strange (our Dr.Strange from Earth 616) tells this Christine "I love you in every universe". The other one is when Wanda is taken into another universe by America Chavez, where the children of that Wanda are terrified of our Wanda (in Scarlett Witch form).  

Desire is the essence of these two scenes -  desire and its consequences. Wanda desires to be with her children. So she thinks that she could use magic and get them from any other universe, despite the fact that those children may be living happily with another Wanda. Though it is also a version of Wanda in another universe it is not the same person with the same life, but a different variant with a different life permutation. Likewise, Dr. Strange and Christine never end up together in any universe despite loving each other at some point in time. The reasons may be different in different universes, but they never get be together in any universe. Dr. Strange desires to be with her in every universe but he cannot. In this movie the book called Dark Hold corrupts both Wanda's and Dr. Strange's variants because they badly want something and would have it at any cost. 

These two scenes put a thought in my mind. Suppose the multiverse is real and in every universe in that multiverse a version of me exists. Would their lives be similar to mine? Would they all be physicists? Or would some of them never became a physicist but became a dancer, writer, photographer, an actor, a super model? (Yup all those things I couldn't become in this life on Earth.) Or nothing at all? (Wait! I am assuming that the social laws of that universe is similar to ours. But what if it was an equal world, where my variant did not have to struggle for anything because of being a woman?) Say in one universe there exists a version of me who has everything she desires. And may be in another there exists one who does not have anything which she desires. (Ah! That's me!!) And in some those who have somethings but not other things they desire. 

And then another question - what if I were to travel the multiverse somehow hoping to find the people I want in my life like Wanda did. Even if I found those people and brought them to my life in this universe, they would never be the same people as in this universe except for their appearance. Like how our Dr. Strange met Christine of Earth 838. Though they understand each other on a certain level, they are not each other's Dr. Strange or Christine. And if our Strange likes her and vice versa, it is still equivalent to two new people liking each other. Even though you may look alike in a multiverse you are different people. Even if you meet your own variant, like both Wanda and Dr. Strange do, even they are not the same people as you. So if I meet a variant of me from another universe who is a physicist, I am still not the same as that person. She may have more publications than me, may not be someone who is not considered "not good enough" no matter what she does, is not conveniently removed from things, may have a lot of freedom to do what she likes, may not be bullied around for life choices and so on. Though she may look like me, she will never be me. I may not understand that me and she may not understand me though we may be variants of each other. My reality is mine only and no matter what versions of me exist across the multiverse, none of them are really me though there may be similarities. 

 Similarly if I were to find a variant of someone I really love, in the multiverse, it will always be a different person than the one I love in this universe. (What Wanda forgot in this movie is precisely this. Though "her" children from another universe might look like her own lost children, they were not the same and they would not love her as they would love their own mother Wanda.) This movie also reminded me of cloning. Say you wish a clone of someone whom you really love, exists, the clone is still another person and not the one you love. The clone can have a different personality than the original one. So would you really be loving the same person when you love a clone?

 One thing which this movie reminds you is - you cannot have everything you desire. No matter how powerful you are; no matter how much earnestly you desire for it; no matter how much it pains you and rips you apart that your desire is not fulfilled. Ultimately you have to let go. Like I've been letting go for all these years and years to come if I am alive...